Do you ever just sit down to write but can’t think of anything to say?

That’s me right now.

I don’t know why nothing seems to come out of my brain at the moment because Lord knows I have a gazillion thoughts running through there right at the moment.

Caleb is at his dad’s for the weekend so it’s going to be late nights on the computer to occupy my time seems how I’m a 30 somethign single woman with a pretty boring life – definitely lacking a social life. Sure I have friends but they are either married or in relationships so that still leaves me to sit at home on the weekends. I honestly need to find some single women my age with no significant others so that I can have someone to hang with when I’m feeling lonely.

LONELY – ah ha that’s the key here. It just dawned on me that I’m feeling lonely tonight. Lonely and no junk food to turn to – OUCH! Not having any junk food to eat my feelings away with leaves me a pretty emotional wreck right now. Yes i’m sitting here crying – such a big cry baby. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I mean I was doing totally fine with this whole single thing and in fact I was even starting to truly enjoy and embrace it and then suddenly it’s started to bother me again.

And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t totally frustrated with God! I mean I don’t understand how He hasn’t brought my husband and I together yet when this is the only dream I’ve ever had. When this is the biggest desire my heart has ever had! And I’d be lying if I said I was still believing for a husband – because at this point I’ve given up hope. I’m sick and tired of waiting – God promised me a husband WAY back in 2001! That just seems totally unfair to me that I’m STILL waiting. But noone ever said life was fair right?

Yeah ok it’s time to get off here and go watch some stupid sappy chic flick so I can cry even harder….lol. Yeah what an exciting life I have.

Until next time.

Tishia